Sunday, February 04, 2007


There's this thing I've been hearing about. Normal people do it; crazed homocidal maniacs do it; teachers and politicians and sales reps and animal trainers also (though sadly very few migrant workers, mothers of small children or impoverished people).

This thing requires that you postpone all activity, often lie prostrate, do not engage in conversation and absolutely come nowhere near a computer, a television or a cell phone. Often it's suggested one do this alone, or at most, with, at most, one other person or a single, obedient pet.

I've long heard of it, but rarely attempted it, but maybe you have?

It's called rest.

Apparently it's quite good for the soul and the body too. Rejuvenating, pleasurable and best of all it requires very little preparation (except to walk away from the 685 projects you have going at any given moment).

Those of us who are new to the activity of rest are fairly easy to spot, I've been told. Our eyes are often slightly bugged out, bloodshot or pinned from some form of stimulant, or just the sheer endorphin rush of our own activities. We often appear to be listening to some inner music that only we can hear and, when spoken to, may take a longer-than-usual number of seconds to register that we've heard you, usually with the phrase, "Huh, whatssat?"

We are liable to feign the activity of rest, to attempt blending in, by reading, walking or watching television while simultaneously folding laundry, or by posting on our blogs rather than actually doing the proscribed nothing that is the main prerequisite of this rest business.

Stopping, you see, for those of us who are rest-resistant, takes us one large step closer to a terrible, frightening place where personal demons, unanswered letters, forgotten memories, books we've meant to read, clothes we've meant to give to the goodwill, big dreams we've planned to achieve but have not gotten around to, and bilious rages at various and assorted guardians who may have either raised us or contributed to that botched job, reside.

So...rest. Despite that those who do engage in it tend to have lovely complexions and full, perky breasts, extremely luxurious heads of hair and longer life spans, I'm not sure I'm ready to commit to it yet. I don't know that they've looked into the side-effects very well.

7 Comments:

At 8:38 AM, Blogger tricia stirling said...

yeah, ultimately i'm with you. i mean, it seems like a nice concept and all....

 
At 3:17 PM, Blogger Stephanie said...

I've always thought that rest was best described by physics. Now (stay with me here), if you're in motion, it doesn't really take that much energy to stay in motion. You can keep on keepin' on. But when you rest, and I mean totally and completely rest, you need a push or a shove or some sort of input of energy to get moving again. That's hard to do. This concludes our physics lesson for today.

 
At 8:43 AM, Blogger Patrushka said...

you people are crazy... did you know it?

 
At 12:26 PM, Blogger Jordan E. Rosenfeld said...

Patricia: I speak for us all when I say, yes, we do know that we are crazy :) We prefer the word "American" however :)

 
At 6:26 AM, Blogger Patrushka said...

I'm sorry to correct you: "Northamerican" ;) because I happen to be American too, though I live in the other end of the continent...

But that's probably due to your country's (not yours) big Ego.

I wonder who decided the country telephone codes... you happen to have the code +1 and we happen to have the code +598. Do you think that's hazard?

But please, tell me that there are other non-US Americans who read this post and will back me here!... I need to know there are allies out there!

 
At 7:48 AM, Blogger Jordan E. Rosenfeld said...

Patricia: I'm sorry, fellow American. I meant "United States-ians."

That's a good, and kind of painful, point about the "1" and "598"...

Indeed, the U.S. runs like an empire . Don't you see shadows of the great Roman Empire at hand? Our preoccupation with money and fame and sex. The way our government sees the entire world as just territories we can and will eventually conquer.

I don't like the ego part (and many other things), but there's a lot to love about it here, still.

 
At 4:23 AM, Blogger Patrushka said...

I saw later that you could have corrected me. I was so silly to fall into one of the very few "false friends" between our languages. Hazard's meaning is not "azar"'s. I meant "a coincidence" or "by chance" and not "at risk" or "in danger". But I guess you guessed it, anyway.


I know there are millions of things/people to love in your country! I will always thank you for jazz, just to say one thing. My life wouldn't be the same without it! And I can't imagine how much bore my life would be without Woody Allen. I wouldn't have learned any language if it wasn't for you who needed to research language teaching/learning at the time of the war. I wouldn't have developed a different point of view if it wasn't for Chomsky and I wouldn't be discovering a new life if it wasn't for Lynn. I wouldn't have a sister if it wasn't for you. I wouldn't have seen Impressionists if it wasn't for the MET in NY. I wouldn't have known that life did not mean money if it wasn't for my American greatuncle. You see... I also have a lot to thank to your country.

 

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