Tuesday, May 30, 2006

I always thought that animals were hard-wired to remember where they get food, so that they could keep on going back to get that food. Therefore, I've decided that my cat has that kind of amnesia where he can't form any new long-term memories, perhaps brought on by a tumble when trying to descend his bulk from a fence, or in one of those terrifying, hair-flying cat fights he used to have with our old neighborhood cat. It's hard to say when it began.

Because every day he sells me the same, waif story. I'm hungry. You're never going to feed me. Oh god, I'm dying of hunger!!! You cruel human eat your juicy, tasty human food while I, all 20 insane pounds of me, must live on mosquito hawks and the particles I dig out of the carpet!

It is the same song every day, no matter that I have fed him (and some would say over-fed him) for the past nine years every day of his life with me. If I have not personally been there to feed him, my husband has, or we have had some kind soul stay in the house to do the job. This is not a cat who has gone without feeding, I promise you:

So the only other option is that he's obsessive compulsive. And trust me when I say that I am not being facetious.


At 2:53 PM, Blogger Stephanie said...

There was an article in the New Yorker about the moochy-nature of dogs that addressed this somewhat (it was 8 years ago). And I do realize your cat is not a dog.

But I think that domesticated animals that evolved around human beings are naturally almost parasitic in their constant pleas for food. For example, as I typed this, our dog came up with her request for lunch. And she was fed an hour ago. By me.

At 3:51 PM, Blogger Myfanwy Collins said...

I think I actually might be a cat or dog.

At 5:01 PM, Blogger Jesse said...

I think your cat is trying to beef himself up in order to battle Fatmouse!

At 5:02 PM, Blogger Jordan E. Rosenfeld said...

Steph, that's hysterical. I guess I feel better. I have continued to make the same mistake, which is to put his food bowl in a location I am destined to pass by many times a day, making him assume I might just be stopping by to feed him...next house, I promise myself, his bowl is going in the basement.

Myf: I doubt that. I'm guessing you're self-sufficient enough to at least feed yourself :)

At 5:07 PM, Blogger Jordan E. Rosenfeld said...

Jesse! I just spit coffee out my nose!!!!!!

At 6:22 AM, Blogger Susan Henderson said...

I like Jesse.

At 1:55 PM, Blogger down_not_out said...

I only wish cats could direct some of their OCD toward picking up hair.

It's not like I'm asking them to pick up my hair-- just their own.

Geeze. Rat children.


At 2:31 PM, Blogger E. said...

His persistence would be cute if his meow wasn't so damn shrill. The neighbors must think we torture him when in reality it is he who tortures us. What are you gonna do...feline entitlement. Dogs have owners whereas cats have staff.

At 2:34 PM, Blogger Jordan E. Rosenfeld said...

E, my dear, you are so correct. However, as he sits here pestering me with a variety of ever changing meows, I noticed that he looks a heck of a lot thinner than he did two months ago when he had free reign of about six different neighborhood chow-holes of his fellow felines!



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