Official countdown to becoming 30 years old? Seven days! Having essentially felt 30 since about the age of 12, it's a relief to be catching up. Now I can begin to age appropriately.

So...I made a commitment to begin working on the non-fiction book proposal. I can't say much more about it until I have a better idea myself, but I am feeling positive. I even began the arduous (not to mention tedious) work of researching the competition...and I am delighted to say there's very little out there doing exactly what I intend to do. Plus, I got Mom on board to help with it, which will give it the necessary texture and levity that it requires. And even though it will still be a desperate labor of love (oh who am I kidding: a desperate labor to get published), it won't be the same as writing a 300 page novel, then rewriting it, then hoping your agent likes it, then discovering that it has all these flaws that you really would have appreciated knowing about before he went gushing about how good your rewrite was.

I am starting to understand just what a long road it really really is to publishing and trying not to deflate in the face of the odds. I'm happy with some of the publications I've made it into lately, with a 90% ratio of paid to not paid.

I bailed out of the Reporter job application process for two reasons: #1, they kept telling me they'd have an answer and then pushing the date out and after the intensity of the interview I started to feel that what they expected me to put out vs. what they were willing to offer was inequitable and their communication with me, unprofessional. Second, I received another potential lead for a magazine-in-process (it is being started by pros in the business who already created and sold a similar magazine in Southern California) which would consider paying me a liveable salary compared to what I've been making to do what I love. I had an intriguing interview that got me very excited about the other possibilities out there for me with my bizarre jumble of skills. It would be either an Editor position or a staff writer position. At any rate, I realized that there was something wrong with waiting around to find out if this Newspaper, albeit a great paper and a very short commute, whose pay is less than I've made in at least five years, would approve of me. I'm starting to really favor the attitude that if you believe you deserve more (and you're not totally nuts) there's no good reason not to keep looking.

As for my novels, I keep having the urge to submit it myself to small presses on my own, but I think that would be foolish...or would it?

Hope you're well out there.

J