Just when I was feeling like I had somewhat of a handle on this mothering gig, especially around our dreaded issue of sleep, someone comes along to remind me that I don't have the ovaries to teach my child how to sleep properly. This person didn't do so purposely or in so many words--she was simply discussing her style of teaching her child and the children she nannies for to sleep. I'm envious, in fact, that she has been so successful. But once again I'm up against that wall: follow the Dr. Sears, gentle, loving baby-first approach that suggests letting them cry it out alone is unnecessarily stressful, or follow the gazillion other "experts" who suggest that it does no harm and it's just weakness and bad habits on the parents part for not going through with this tough-love system.

Maybe I am weak and afraid of putting us all through nights of screaming. I honestly don't know. I can't sort out my instincts from the external input.

And the reason I even talked to this woman is that our wonderful babysitter who is so good to our son and so flexible, is moving. In two weeks.

I'm bummed and this is a crappy post.